The twists and turns in my “career” have led me to an unexpected place. I am a biology tutor at a community college.
Though the math tutors in the Math and Science Resource Room tend to be quite busy, especially after the first exam, I tend to sit in the corner on what we have called “biology island” trying to fill the hours much of the time.
On a recent and typically slow Wednesday afternoon a general biology student came in to ask some questions that she had asked her professor. The professor had told her that her questions were more involved than what they would cover so he sent her to me, though her questions might have been better suited to the physics or chemistry tutors. Still I did my best to find information regarding her detailed inquiries that were all in some way related to atoms.
In general biology the students are presented with that familiar diagram of an atom: the colorful little balls representing protons and neutrons are clustered in the center, the nucleus, while the little balls that represent electrons are seen resting on concentric circles surrounding the nucleus.
The professor had told the class that atoms don’t look this way in reality, but that the familiar diagram remained the best that we know to represent them. The curious student had asked the professor what atoms really look like; can they be seen; how the standard model was derived to begin with; and how we even know that the proposed structure of atoms and their interaction with one another is as it is believed to be.
During the 20 minutes or so that the student and I spent together, she apologized a couple of times for what she seemed to think were unnecessary questions. I assured her that I was completely fine with answering questions, or trying to in her case, and that I found her questions to be most interesting myself.
As a biology person I find the world that can be seen only with electron microscopes to be absolutely fascinating, so pondering the world that is even more “invisible” became somewhat fascinating to me as well.
In those moments I seemed to catch a bit of the student’s curiosity, and I enjoyed the joy and the openness with which she questioned and sought answers. It reminded me of the way I used to be, not that long ago actually.
In looking for direction for my career and in dealing with the disappointments and challenges life has tossed at me since completing my most recent degree, I think cynicism may have replaced wonder and monotony may have replaced curiosity in my life.
As both an artist, in that I write, and a science minded person, in that I have an exercise physiology degree, I suppose that part of me that has questions and seeks answers could never really be left behind. I expect not.
What was most interesting and inspiring about that young student was the fact that she’s not a biology, chemistry, or physics major; she didn’t need to know. She just wanted to know. Therein lies the joy in wondering.
The Listener 